Ben Roethlisberger gives in to sexual temptation: out this week vs. Raiders

Single (and married) women beware, Big Ben Roethlisberger is making you his top priority this week by sitting out against the Raiders.

According to false sources, Big Ben needs to adjust his work-life balance, so instead of participating in this Sunday’s away game, he’ll take part in bottomless mimosas at Mimi’s Cafe near downtown Pittsburgh.

Head coach Mike Tomlin responded by saying “Ben has priorities, and we know him well enough to realize how beneficial it is for Ben to have 3-6 women draped over his arms at any time. We tried last season to limit it to 2-3 women, but Big Ben just wasn’t satisfied. We learned our lesson.”

The Steelers go into Oakland to face an 0-2 Raider’s squad that struggled to contain Reggie Bush and the Miami Dolphins last week.

 

 

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