Hauschka questions play-calling: “we should’ve kicked it”

“Look, all I’m saying is I had the 5th most field goals of any kicker this year. Fifth! That’s big money, baby. And in the playoffs, I kick a two!! Why isn’t the media discussing field-goal-gate?!?”

Hauschka has been notably upset throughout this year’s postseason, due in part to the Seahawks reluctance to kick. “Me and Matt Prater had the same amount of field goals,” Steven huffed, “and he actually told me he was drunk in the one and only game he played. How does he get more action than the me. They don’t call me Steven Bringin’ Down the Hauschka for nothin!”

Understandably, Marshawn Lynch, deflategate and a litany of other distractions have drawn the focus away from the Middlebury College standout. Hopefully next year, after Steven leads the Seahawks 3rd straight Super Bowl, we won’t overlook this champion.

Leave a Reply