Tag Archives: johnny football

2016 Predictions: Unemployed and homeless Manziel asking for actual cash

Manziel’s 3 snaps catapult Browns past Saints

When the most pre-popular pre-season backup quarterback ever Johnny Manziel got his first snaps of the game, his impact was immediately felt by Texans all around the country. Drew Brees was seen cursing under his breath on the sidelines. “I knew were going to lose the second Johnny Football took the field. The guy is just a winner,” Brees admitted after the game. “But I wanted our team to finish the rest of the game, just to show heart. But in reality, we had no chance.” Statistically, Johnny is on pace to shatter Texans’ expectations: with 1 incomplete pass per 2 games, he’s projected to throw 8 incomplete passes (not including the Super Bowl that Johnny will lead the Browns to) by the end of the season. But if you ask anyone from Texas, Johnny’s never thrown an incomplete pass a day his life, so the 8 projected incomplete passes are unnerving to his supporters.